Final Post

Wow. This has been an extraordinary experience. In the last ninety days, i've worked out profusely, and jumped some mad rope every day, not to mention the amount of chicken, and chicken eggs i've consumed ( i really owe something to that species). I've listened to countless podcasts (mostly "Stuff You Should Know") and seen the dark beginnings of a lot of early mornings.

I've been waiting to do this project since i saw Patrick's project completed. And now i've finally achieved something i really set myself out to do. This is one of only a few things i can really say that about in my life. Or at least that have any meaning.

I learned a lot about myself, and what i'm capable of, especially under long-term pressure. I chose to do my project in a sort of cross-roads point in my life, and it has helped me out quite a bit.

I've learned a great deal about the human body, and how to take care of it properly (in terms of exercise and diet). But more importantly, i actually DID the things that i learned, which to me, is at least twice as important as learning them.

I've developed a lot more respect for people who are "In-Shape". I now know how much pain and discipline it takes to get to that level of fitness.

I've learned to eat. Where to eat, how to eat, and what i want to eat.

After splurging a little once my final workout was done, and with each indulgence, i've learned that most added sugars, juices, and all-processed crap is just not worth eating. Not worth the money, or the time, or the harmful effects on the body. But a good piece of chocolate never really gets old, just nurse the thing and don't eat it all at once.

Overall, i'm really glad i've done this for myself. I've opened the door one jump at a time to the rest of my life. To being a better martial artist, brother, friend, student, teacher, and someday, parent and grandparent (Insha'allah). I've laid the foundation to the wellness of myself and others.

Thank you Patrick and Chen, for excellent guidance. Thank you, Renfield, Abby, Watson, Brian, (and Pam), for the awesome team work. Go Team Go!.

A special thanks to Amineh, who cooked for me at least once a week, grocery shopped with me, kept me on track with my diet as a whole, took my pictures, provided a lot of moral and existential support, who put up with my bad attitude at times, encouraged me to do more 8MA, and who leveled up my materia for me while i wrote this post ;)

Also to my grandma who taught me how to cook chicken in various ways, and who cooked lunch when times were getting rough.

A thanks to my friends and family, who provided a lot of support and encouragement, and late night talks. You know who you are.

And finally, thank you Donn F. Draeger, for being totally awesome, providing great encouragement to me throughout my project, and for writing a plethora of very good books.
Thank you Michael Pollan, for also writing a lot of good books. Thank you Josh Clark and Charles W. Bryant, for the many late night podcasts that kept me awake and sane.

Thank you readers.

This has been a great climb, and i highly recommend the view. I look forward to continuing my exercises and jump roping ...in a few days and for the long term. Good luck to all my group members in their post-pcp lives, and to all the new-comers working their way to the top.

May you all become strong and well

Day 89

Whew. That was one intense workout. A good project-ender, a little something to remember it by.
I stretched before hand, but in that second super-set my arms and neck were starting to cramp up.
Luckily, just slowing down fixed it. But damn that thing was a beast. I sort of feel proud of myself for that. (er, i mean Confident-in-my-ability-to-express-myself-on-my-environment)

Received Watson's gift today, so i had something to add a little PCP flavor to tonight's workout.
Very nice, Watson, thank you. It made my day.

Seriously, just tomorrow, and that's it?! Almost done? It's a little hard to believe, and i think it's going to take some getting used to after everything is done. Unfortunately i probably won't be able to post tomorrow, and if i do, it won't be my "final post", so be sure to stay tuned till Sunday.

Day 88

Apparently Indra couldn't decide on what the weather should be today, and neither have i.

My last day of school today. Like the weather, it shifted from slightly sunny to lightning bolts, and back again. It was good to see my friends and teachers one last time. I hope for many that it's not the last. Spent some of my day in limbo, some in discourse, and some in conversation.
Almost no studying, and of course my Latin and History finals, respectively.

And now i'm home. I'm going to take a shower, stretch, and get to the workout.

Best of luck on your day 88's.

Day 87

Saw a picture of my back for the first time today. Amineh's been trying to tell me all along, and finally took this picture to prove it to me.

Damn. It's been a couple of days since my last post.
I'm alive, and still on the wagon, as it were. Though to be honest, a lot of times i wish i weren't.
Now more than most other times of the project. I really can't wait for a day without jump ropes.

Now i know i should be happier and feel more unobstructed, "as if a great burden has been lifted," but i don't really feel that way. And if there is one thing i've learned about myself, it's that working out and eating right don't make me any more of a happier person. In fact, if anything i've had more encounters with a more emotional side of myself than before.
But, this is one of the best parts of it for me. It's sort of a way of burning the impurities out, and it's not exactly a pretty process.

"The sword is for cutting the foolishness out of hearts, not the hearts out of fools"

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finals are going well, and tomorrow will be the end of them. Looking forward to a break in the homework train, but not so much to working more days out of the week. Things are going pretty well.

Amineh has kept me on track with the diet portion. I don't think i would have had the inclination (or the time) to actually eat my allotted portions of protein...or dinner.

I've also made a habit of doing 8 min. Abs every day. Which has helped out a lot.

..Aaand that's really about it for now. Until next time.

Day 81

Whew. Finals week is next week.

And it's been a pretty busy week in preparation. What was that phrase again? Grim and optimistic? I think that would characterize this point in my journey. Both in school and the project.

I spent 9 hours (mostly consecutive) of Wednesday working on a bunch of history homework i put off till the last minute, though i got some 8 min abs and the jumproping in first thing after i woke up.

Patrick said our diets these last two weeks would be closer to "normal" levels, but i'm still having trouble eating all of that protein, especially at breakfast and dinner.

I'm optimistic on the whole, and have been thinking about all of the things i've done, enjoyed, and learned this semester - which is quite a bit, even before i mention the PCP. Lots of good conversations with teachers and friends, lots of new music and books, and plenty of notes ( i have an almost religious reverence for notes and the act of notetaking)

And over it all looms the sweet promise of Summer, days without school and without the project - which will be ending in the same week. Don't get me wrong, im enjoying myself, and working hard (though i'd like to be working harder), but a big part of me has got a serious case of longing. What do they call it? Senioritis? -- I try and push it out of my mind, but it really is a good thing that i'm starting to think beyond next week, yeah?

A great deal of uncertainty clouds my Summer, but i feel i can go confidently at least, whichever way i go, knowing that i will have achieved something that really took a lot of effort and work and commitment. I know a lot more about myself now, and will know more by the end of next week. So, it's a good thing.

Day 76 - Indulgence III

Mocha, Frozen yogurt (with fruit), and Sushi

A long awaited Indulgence!

And 1000 calories is a lot of food, let me tell you. By the time 600 or so calories rolled around i caught myself thinking "do i have to?" and then i thought that i'll sort of regret it if i don't.

So, this indulgence i knew for certain i wanted a mocha. It's the only thing that i used to drink all of the time, that i haven't had in an indulgence yet. We went to the Peet's Coffee near Amineh's house, and i decided to opt out of the whip cream option just out of principle. 2% Milk, and iced.

Yogurt was a pretty successful first indulgence, and i decided to honor it with a second go. I got considerably more this time, and piled on the raspberry flavored mochi cubes. That stuff is delicious. No taro flavored yogurt this time, so i got a swirl of chocolate and irish mint. Which turned out pretty decently.

The sushi was long awaited. I've had better sushi ofcourse, but absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or is it, absence makes the taste grow stronger? Either way, it was some pretty tasty business and well worth it.

Most surprising out of this indulgence was that there was no backlash. Nothing kicked back, and i didn't have a sugar rush worth a mention. We did do a lot of walking today though, and especially after our eating, which, i believe helped to mitigate the effects.

So, all in all, today went well. Tasty indulgence, a strong workout, and plenty of rest (finally).


Night y'all.



Post Scriptum: Congratulations Kathleen for getting a elected President of your Student Body for next year, and for getting to meet the Speaker of the House! I'm very prou-ahem--Confident in your ability to assert yourself on your environment.

Day 73

Wednesday.

A pretty fruitful day. Went and got my blood test and physical done, as well as a teeth cleaning at the dentist. I'm trying to get as much out of my dad's insurance before i enter the great uninsured gap, which, for a Comparative Religions major, may be a very long one.

I cleaned my living quarters and got some laundry done, went shopping and got my paycheck.



...but didn't get any homework done.

This is one of those things that always seems to happen. Whether i intend it or not. And at the end of the day, all i feel is the mounting guilt of failure.

I can, however, still manage to enjoy my day. I'm still happy i can see my floor. And tomorrow is a new day right?



Hope your day was productive AND you enjoyed it.

Day 71

Sprouting Onion

Today was pretty great.

Got into Sacramento pretty late last night, but luckily got enough sleep today. Tomorrow might be a nightmare, but today was good.

Amineh and I took my mom and sister out to breakfast for Mother's Day, where i ate my morning snack. Shortly after my sister came with us to the Natural Foods Co-op, where we initiated her in the long tradition of taking one of every flier/handout that they offer your first time, and by having her drink some Kefir for the first time.

I bought a small basil, and along with the Rosemary i was given at school this semester, i intent to try my hand at keeping plants alive for an extended period of time --- My track record isn't great. But, there's always new beginnings eh?

So.. that next week of workouts looks pretty brutal. I mean, i'm optimistic, but damn.
Also, i'm going to have to set up my own chicken coup in the back yard if i'm going to be eating eight eggs a day... or just buy them by the flat. But even after all this egg-eating, i still love them.
Chicken breast on the other hand, is something i'm going to lay off of for the rest of the year after my project is done.


Alright, time for pcp sleep.



Oh, yeah and "Happy Mother's Day, Mom and Grandma"
"Felix Dies Matris! Mater et Avia"

Day 68

I woke up today knowing i was out of my valley. And since then it's been a good day. I got straight to work and things went pretty smoothly.

Work did one of those things where it looks like it's going to be a day from hell, but it actually turns out alright.

Got in some 8 min abs, which i don't do nearly often enough.
The rest of today's workout was good, though my body has been rejecting Planks the last couple of times. I get through them, but they kick my ass. The Elevated push-ups were a nice change.


Alright, short post and time for sleep.

Day 65 - 66

This will be a pretty tight week for me, so i guess in terms of challenges i'm not quite out of the valley yet.

At this point i'm mostly afraid that i'm not really working hard enough. I catch myself stalling before a workout, resisting and taking a bad attitude when i finally get to it.

Granted, my workouts are typically too late at night, and a great deal of my problems stem from my not doing the workout while the sun is up. And i was thinking the other day that, despite my work, and how i look and feel, i don't really feel any stronger, and i'm not any stronger against my sparring partners. I worry a lot that i must be doing something wrong, or not well enough. That i could fail my project somehow, and especially because of some inability to tough it out, or work hard enough.

But, when it comes down to it, this is all just a bunch of complaining. I know i can't take my worries too seriously, and in the end, i can't give up. I just have to remember to not let it get to me too much.

Day 60 - 64

Mmmm, delicious breakfast. Pictured above: Chicken, Asparagus, Sunflower greens, whole grain Tortillas, and Oatmeal. Best of all, i didn't have to cook it or measure it myself!

So, these last four days have been more of a rebound from a string of ("horrible, no good, very bad") days.

My iPod came back to life, which is always a fortunate thing to see happen to expensive machinery, (and old friends! ...wait). And in general affairs are looking like they'll be back in order shortly.

Made it to Sacramento alive this week, and took a journey to the Natural Foods Co-op there, which, if you've never been to one, is like a small Mecca for eating well. I took the opportunity to stock up on oatmeal and brown rice. Also, sought out some Renfield-inspired Pumpernickel.

Exercises were going alright. Tough, and longer than they probably should be, but i'm working on it. Seeing some progress in Kung-fu Sit-ups, though i never expected to. But still, much like pull-ups, those beyond 1.5 sets are just jumps and futile attempts. Planks seemed particularly hard last time as well. But, so much the better!


Well, that's all for now anyways.

Oh yeah, Day 64 is up --->


Be strong everyone.

Day 54 - 59

So, to start off, its been a bad week for technology. I broke my nice digital scale (i dropped it on it's corner while taking it to Sacramento). My iPod broke, by being fine one minute and then refusing to turn on forever the next. Aaaand i accidentally put my car into neutral in the fast lane (which, to my surprise, apparently wasn't a problem)

On the up side however, i did buy a new jumprope (yay)

Pictured above from left to right: Amineh, my jumprope.

Food is going well.
I'm expanding my borders a little bit in terms of daily oatmeal. That is to say, trying different kinds of hot cereals that prove to be delicious.
Also, fresh eggs are at least twice as good as any egg you could buy in the store. If it is within your means, i highly suggest you find some, its so worth it. The egg itself is incredibly rich and has a much cleaner taste to it. Everything about it feels "right". Seriously, go find some.

It's been an interesting couple of days, mostly characterized between frequent (and sometimes rapid) ups and downs. I don't have bipolar disorder or anything, but it's been either deep sadness or real contentment, with not a lot of inbetweens.

I find that, even on catch-up day (wednesday; today) i wait till the last minute to do my exercises. Still. But, even in the worst of circumstances, i do my workout. Even if it's four in the morning (like last saturday). I dread it all day long, but i won't let it go in the end. And after the workout, just like always, i'm free of stress. Kind of reminds me of a quote...

"the pupil follows out this intention with untiring industry. As though he had no higher aspirations he bows under his burden with a kind of obtuse devotion, only to discover in the course of years that forms which he perfectly masters no longer oppress but liberate."
- Herrigel

...i may not have much going for me, but at least i can say i have "obtuse devotion"

___________________________________________

During tonight's jumpropes, i couldn't help but think about how i'm slowly destroying my old self every night and building a new one. Which reminds me of the monomyth - something i've been wanting to mention since before i started my PCP.

By "monomyth" i mean that process in which each individual is made to venture into the unknown (i.e. their own subconscious) and ultimately fight their own demons. Returning to the conscious world as victor when they're done, and applying their new found victory over themselves to their life.

This process corresponds to the PCP quite well. Often times, pushing oneself and maintaining self-discipline is one of the hardest things to overcome, because it has to come of your own will against your usual habitual patterns. Am i making any sense here? I guess what i mean to say is:
"Final Boss: Your Old Self"

Days 52 - 54

Digital Upgrade!
Yes, it's true, all this time i've been using a conventional scale, but now i have digital technology on my side! Which, is even nicer than i thought it would be.

This past couple of days has gone alright for me. Somehow i keep getting tossed around until my exercises are in the evenings again, but midterms are done, so i should come a little easier.
The workouts are sucking a little because i am so tired by the time i start them, but i get everything done, and when im done, im always happy.

By far my biggest challenge right now is the diet. I have to eat my lunch in two sections, and i spend most of my day buying more chicken, cooking chicken, and then consuming chicken. And chicken because it's the cheapest i can find. The protein portion in the morning has not gone so well, especially today, when i actually had it to eat, and then my step-sister's puppy found it. Very unfortunate. But, all of this is just my complaining. It won't be long until i am more in the swing of it. And i'm sort of hoping that the protein goes down again next week.

Looking forward to Sacramento this Sunday. Both in terms of my little sister's birthday (Happy Birthday Kathleen!) and because we reserved some fresh eggs at the farmer's market. It should be interesting to see the difference between those and store eggs, i hear it's like comparing real food to cardboard... but i hope to blog about it whichever direction it goes.

The more i think about it, the more i really owe a debt to the god of chickens for my muscle fibers. Maybe i'll go and make an offering on a mountain or something after my project is done. =D

Oh, and as far as jumpropes go, im using a heavy vinyl one for now, and damn is it different. I swear it's in the realm of weight lifting, and actually i took the weights out of the handle to make it lighter. Still, it worked better than "Old Jumpy", my rope jumprope.. which i can't even jump more than twice with anymore. It was a pretty weird feeling. That light vinyl rope i had really bent me to its style, because i can hardly jump with anything else!

Day 51

A long day.

Food highlights of the day: Kefir in the morning; Amineh's delicious chicken.

Listened to: Stephan Hoeller

Found clock for timing jumps, hope to find an egg timer soon.

The End

Day 49 - Indulgence II

Today i ate my second indulgence, which consisted of: a bar of Swiss Dark Chocolate (2.5 servings; 600 cal.) and a 1 oz. chunk of Brie. (100 cal.) I ate them sometime after breakfast but before lunch.

Putting my hesitations aside, i devoured half of the bar within, maybe 15 mins, and took my time with the last half (over several hours). I knew and expected to get a sugar rush, but man was it apparent. I developed a head ache, became irritable, and wouldn't hold still. I could feel my head getting fuzzy, and i redeveloped a cough i used to get when i ate too much chocolate in, lets say "my previous life". A cough really? yes really, kinda weird i know, but there it is. So i spaced out the next half of the bar, and let my head settle a little. Despite the backlash, i enjoyed every bit of it, though, in the future (post project), i plan to space out any chocolate consumption by days at least. Half a serving would have done me fine, and in truth, it's about all i can stay mindful with, at least a third of those little squares i don't even remember eating, and probably closer to two thirds.

The Brie on the other hand was delicious, and that was the end of it. Of course i know that the real end of it was somewhere in the middle of today's jumpropes, or maybe even tomorrow's jumpropes. But it didn't leave my head swimming for a half-hour anyway.

Speaking of today's jumpropes:


My jumprope broke at one end on my second to last set today. Luckily, there was enough space on the rope for me to jump when i grabbed the handle-less end and finished my last set. And i've still got Ol' Jumpy here as a back up, but i'll be seeking out a new vinyl rope sometime in the near future.

I'll have to think on a fitting rite of passage for what's come to be a good friend of mine. Even though we had a love-hate relationship for all of our days together, and even though i invented the term for (and often plotted) it's murder, it continued to put up with my bad language and was there whenever i needed it. So, Farewell JumpRope, may you have an auspicious rebirth... or whatever it is that happens to the consciousness of vinyl when it's deconstructed.

And now time for construction!



Valete

Day 46

Today was a weird one.

Learned a single-leg takedown in Karate this morning; shared Joseph Campbell and Alan Watts lectures with my Environmental Econ Prof, Took my Latin III Midterm (92% whoo), sat in on Prof. Smith's history lecture, and talked for a while, and then drove home early because my actual history class was canceled. When i got home i canceled Jujutsu, because i was too tired teach. I was a wreck, and i actually got sleep the night before! Being tired is a real enemy of my Project thus far. I find its when i'm physically tired that A) My roommates choose to bake two Pizzas, and B) i actually crave that pizza. Resisting hasn't been too much of a problem for me throughout my project, but it really sucked today. I ate my diner early, and then took a long nap. And the nap fixed just about everything.

My workout went more or less smoothly, except that the push-ups today ate me alive. I don't know what it is, but some days, exercises that are normally just reasonably difficult, become seemingly insurmountable. It's just kinks in the pattern of growth i guess, but it gets a little discouraging at times. ("ive done this how many times? and now i can't even do a few well? What the hell is wrong with me?") I've been trying also not to water the seeds of doubt, but sometimes a leaf reaches the light anyways ("You don't really want to be in Peak condition" and "your still not working quite hard enough") But, this too will pass if i just let it.

Alright, until next time.

oh yeah, here's a latin quote i found particularly PCPish

"You pray for good health and a body that will be strong in old age. Good - But your rich foods block the gods' answer and tie Juppiter's hands"

- Persius, Saturae

Looking forward to Kung-fu sit-ups tomorrow..


Valete, Amici
(Be Strong, Friends)

Day um, what day is it again? (44)

Pretty tired today. Mondays continue to be the thorn in my side, i did my workout, but at the cost of two classes today. I needed the sleep, and i can afford the lost time.
Those lunges really lit me up yesterday though, i seem to remember them not being so mean, but i'm glad they came back around to visit anyways.

Today's workout went well enough. Though i had to do Pull-ups last, and in secret.. but what's a few stealth-ups now and then, yeah?

Food is going well, i'm steadily improving my chicken baking skills, and i'm thinking about breaking up the pear monopoly with some strawberries tomorrow. (via the Clayton Anti-trust Act)

On the whole, things seem to be falling back into an order again. I always enjoy these little regroup phases before life gets tangled back up in the wiring. In and Yo.


Alright, time to add some dualism to my day and go to sleep.


bene requiesce, et fortes este, amici.

Day 42

Got my ropes in early before breakfast, but the rest of the day was pretty lazy. That is to say, i played FF7 all day (besides a few errands). My foot, i am happy to say is getting much better, and i'm back to walking and jumping normally.. what a relief.

Food highlight of the day: Salmon burgers. Very tasty.


Alright, until tomorrow.

Days 40-41

I've been experimenting with exercise first thing in the morning. Yesterday i did the entire work out, and i'll admit, it was pretty tiring, but not impossible. Today, i did only the jumpropes before breakfast, this arrangement will probably be the most common for me.

Also, if you're an oatmeal eater like me, i recommend frying an egg "sunny side up" and then mixing it into your oatmeal, broken yolk and all, it's pretty delicious and helps break the monotony of a hard boiled egg every morning.

Alright, time for work, until next time.

Day 38 and some change

Things have been going alright.

In the food department, i'm getting a lot more diversity in, and overall am pretty content with my diet. I don't go hungry, and i look forward to each meal and snack.
Amineh signed up for a program called "Farm fresh to you" which delivers a box of organic in-season produce to your residence weekly. We made artichokes for lunch on Saturday, and they were delicious. I still have two left, and can't wait to roast them. I'm starting to get to a place where i have enough surplus of food that i can really change it up in a timely manner. I also spent an hour and a half talking to my sister today, talking about food the entire time. It was nice to share some of the experience.

The jumpropes are starting to grow on loved ones as well. Amineh is up to a good number a day now, and my little sister is on her first steps to starting.
Health loves company.

In the set-backs department, i've had my left foot. I'm pretty sure i've cracked something, namely one of my metatarsals, but i can't really be sure. I've considered asking for an alternate exercise for my jumpropes, just in order to stay off of it, but i'm not actually sure that the jumping is so hard on it. I might still do just that, but for now i'm still on track, and it hasn't gotten any worse.
Yesterday was harder, we sparred a bit in my college Karate class, and i got huge blisters from mat burn (similar to carpet burn, but with tatami), so...that was an ibuprofen day, but luckily they healed up by the next day.

I've been stretching more and more lately too, i actually did some triangle and warrior and natarajasana and a few others rather than just my typical forward bend, back bend, leg stretches and twist. It felt good to reach all those other parts of my legs i've been neglecting to stretch. I've always known stretching is key, but i haven't always had the good sense to slow myself down to do it.

Oh yeah, and Pull-ups, are still pretty difficult, but i've created a sort of handicap for the sets beyond the first, which i do normally. Once i start to not be able to lift myself, i start my pull-ups by kneeling on a chair, and use my legs to lift/stabilize just enough of myself to get use out of my arms. It's still a pull-up, though it's at 70% or something i still get all my sets in that way.

And pistol squats, oh pistol squats! They are pretty close to an arm exercise at this point. I'm seeing progress... i guess, but damn are they brutal. Those bicycles are pretty brutal too. But i'm really loving it.

I regret to admit i haven't done the 8 Min Ab workout yet, though i fully plan to.

It's kind of nice to know that i can disconnect jump-ropes from the rest of the workout, it might make managing it a bit easier, and it certainly makes jumping before school much more feasible.


Alright, i'm getting tired now. Diligentes este, amici.